So when I was a kid, about 5 or 6, I’d go down by the creek on my uncle’s farm. I would sit on this rock, I named it “God’s Rock”, and I would play and talk to God. It was so peaceful, joyful, and I knew he was there.
I got in the way of my life again. I did Alanon for 8 years at age 32 and the relationship rekindled again. I was seeing the miracles, and peace in my life everyday. When I got cancer, God was with me every step of the way. During that time my memories are not about the cancer experience, but my relationship with God. Within 4 months I was cancer free.
4 months after that we all got the flu, but my husband wasn’t recovering. In April he was diagnosed with cancer and on June 9th he died. The barrel of mistrust slid down over me to protect me from all the world. My deceptive perception took over. I had a ranch in debt that my husband and I were buying and I needed to manage it by myself; I had to keep my 40 hr/ week job in town for the insurance and the money; I had my twin 15 yr old boys to finish raising; and I was a mess. No one could heal my pain. I had a suicide hotline phone number on the headboard of my bed. One evening I went to sit on the hill by my husband’s grave and I yelled at God to prove he as there. The sun was setting and the deer walked out on the meadow...it was beautiful. I yelled, “That is not enough. Prove that you are there!” The coyotes started howling and I yelled, “No, not enough! You and Jerry left me..PROVE that you are there!” Then I heard an owl persistently hooting behind me, but refused to look. They kept hooting which was unusual, there are no trees on the hills and it was still very light so I turned to look. Behind me was the rock monument that sheepherders used to build as they watched their bands of sheep. It looks like a chimney. When finished they placed a stick from a tree branch coming out of the center that is probably as big around as my thumb. Crowded on that branch were two owls looking down the hill at me hooting away...I knew I was not alone. Can you imagine the persistent, forgiving love of a God that withstood all the screaming and anger I had shown Him?
I read 30 AD and 33 AD, and the encounters of Mavia with Jesus described my experience on God’s Rock.
When I read “Christian” books, I look up Bible references due to my experiences with Bible misinterpretation that I have encountered. Many of these books talk about Jesus, but not the personal relationship one can have with him.
Ted Decker....I double checked your statements too at first. Then, the books and journaling clicked for me while my trust built while reading.
During Covid, some experiences of rough waters have hit my shores. Unlike any other books I have read (except the Bible) I was drawn to read these meditations daily. I started on the second book first then realized I needed to go to the book one, because it is a process. I read, journaled and read the affirmations.
Again, that feeling of being one with the Father through Yeshua rekindled. I love the footnote numbers that correlate to the actual Bible verses at the back of the book and I refer to them often. I love the stories you tell to clarify points and my favorite is the story in book one, page 17, about the two rooms. The first room is filled with things that represent your entire life. Shadows move in and out of this room and keeping the room in order is one’s duty. The second is a room full of light, a room without judgement or condemnation..and all you have to do to obtain the peace, love, wisdom and union is step into the room. I have read this over and over to see which room I am standing in.
My second favorite is the meditation on perception, page 78, book one. The influence of my perception was a huge ah ha for me.
I love the relationship that is rekindling for me with God. Instead of striving, it is a flowing...exactly like when I sat on God’s rock as a child.
These books will be like s slap in the forehead when you finally realize...this is what the Bible is saying.
If you want more than knowing facts about God, if you want to cross that line and have an actual relationship...I recommend these books.
